How could this be?

Corey

The day you came into this crazy world was the day that my life was forever changed. You made my lifelong dreams come true; you made me a mom. Up to that  point it was the biggest, most awesome life altering event I have ever experienced, and you know I am not a big fan of changes. But oh how blessed I was to have you. I am humbled to be your mama, and I’ve loved you more than anything since the day you were born. I have loved you every single moment of your life. It has been both painful and exciting to see you grow into the beautiful woman/mom that you are today.  Painful because I wanted to just freeze time and memorize your sweet voice, remember every detail of your tiny fingers and toes. I wanted to always remember your funny faces, your laugh, and your joyful passion for life. Painful because I wanted the moments of you crying when I left for work to last forever but painful because I never wanted to see you hurt. Painful because I know how precious time is. I wanted time to slow down some so that we could live those cherished days a little longer. But it’s also been exciting too. It was exciting to watch you roll over for the first time, find you toes, sit up, then stand. And even more exciting to hear you talk ( what was I thinking when I encouraged you to talk lol), see you walk, then run. It was exciting to see you learn to ride a bike and run through the sprinklers, to see you eat ice cream and comfort your little friends or teach them to speak correctly. It was exciting to see you learn to read and learn to fish and play and to love people. Now all these years later I pray for your future and I pray that God gives me the strength I need to let you be a grown up and all that comes with that. God knows I needed you in my life to help me become a better person, the person I needed to be and save me from myself. You did that for sure. From the sleepless nights when you were just a baby to the times I couldn’t take my eyes off of you when you were a crazy teenager. From the first time I heard your little laugh to all the times when you almost killed me post op with fits of laughter. From the times that you were inconsolable and I had no idea what I was doing to the times when only I could make things all better. I have loved you deeper than the depths of the ocean, and more than all the stars in the sky. Being your mom has been one of the greatest blessings of my life. Know that I will love you forever, be here for you always, and always hold onto you with all my might. I love you to the moon & back. Until the last star burns out...and even then. There may be times when I can’t physically be here for you but know that I always wish I could be. No matter how our lives change you will always be my first born, my first love, my Corey Jean Jelly Bean. I’m excited to see what the future holds for you. You’ve grown up on me in what seems like a blink of an eye ... I  hope the days slow down soon ...happy birthday Jelly Bean!