I am who I am

Life has knocked me down a few times challenging my strength and testing my faith. I  have experienced loss in abundance, and more than my share of struggles which reminds me of my resilience. No matter how many times life has me down on my knees I always get up. I'm creative, artistic, love drawing, photography, writing & I love to be in nature. My granddaughter is the love of my life & my daughters are my life. I have a lot to say, most of it is rubbish, but I'll say it anyways. If I were 4 years old I would be rattling off trivialities like my favorite color or cartoon character but I’m not 4 anymore & I won’t describe myself in that manner so I will present me just how I see myself. I have a black belt degree in smartass and I’m a few credits short of a masters in bitch-ology. My smart mouth always gets me in trouble and if it is not my mouth, it’s my facial expressions!

I will laugh at you if you do something stupid, but I will cry with you when you are sad or hurt. I am caring & I am a good friend. I am very observant, especially of unique people and I can spot fake people from a mile away. I find odd stuff & old people intreging. I could sit & people watch all day as long as I had a big cup of tea & a few cigarettes.

I've got a dirty mind, with all my imperfections I'm still sexy and seductive.  I am willing to try anything twice . I'm a caring friend with a potty mouth and I'm a smart ass at times. I've got a good heart and kind soul for such a sinner. I'm a tomboy but I love leather, lace and pearls. I'm short tempered & I can be impatient at times (OK a lot) and can be quite the bitch if you push the wrong button or push the right button at the wrong time. I always stand up for the underdog and I am not afraid to offend, embarrass, piss off or disrespect someone that is wrong or doing someone dirty. I believe in being honest but I attempt to do it tactfully, it doesn’t always work out so well but I do try. I'm not afraid to die but I am terrified of being old one day. I like music of all kinds. I am sarcastic. I have a pretty dark sense of humor but I'm a nice & caring person and I've been told I'm thoughtful and helpful.. I don't like reality but I live here so what am I to do but deal with it. I love thunder & lightning. I'm an animal lover & I've had many kinds of pets, one my mother diced up by accident. It was a frog. I don't eat her beans anymore. I currently have a dog. I believe in living fast and dying young. I own my reality without apology. I see goodness in the world. I'm Bold. I'm fierce. I'm grateful. I'm wild, crazy and gloriously free.

I'm sometimes shy when meeting people for the first time but I'm outgoing when you get to know me. I learned the hard way at a very young age that I cannot count on others to take care of me so I'm strong, self-reliant & not at all emotionally needy. I won't coddle you nor will I allow you to coddle me.  I know that I could've been a better parent.
But I know one thing for sure, I have amazing children & I'm happy when I am with them. I believe in karma, fairies, mermaids  & the magic of intention. I trust my gut, have a strong intuition & listen to my inner-self. I'm controlling and I have erratic mood swings. I am utterly stubborn. Weak or needy people irritate me.  I am more interested in life than death.  The older I get the less sure who I am or what I really want out of life. I've made mistakes in my life oh boy have I made mistakes .
 I've let people take advantage of me & I've accepted way less than I deserve for far to long. But, I've learned from my bad choices
 Even though there are some things I can never get back and people who will never be sorry, I'll know better next time and I will no longer settle for anything less than I deserve.
Love me or hate me but know that nobody will ever change me. Most people couldn't handle half of what I've dealt with. There's a reason I do the things I do, there's a reason I am who I am...accept me or turn and  walk away err I run and run very fast lol